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[forgingfires]

"You have contacted the great Red Son! Leave a message after the beep and keep it brief. If this is about a repair job, state the object and problem."

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[forgingfires]

[He chuckles sardonically at that.]

I was that way too. I was looking for something where it felt like I could start letting go. Just an inch where it didn't feel like I was trapped with all those feelings.

And then he finally did! We were getting somewhere. There was that first step and it felt like we could go forward.

[He lifts his glass.] Then I pissed him off and instead of just being focused on where I fucked up, he went for my throat with everything he could use to hurt me. [He downs the glass.]

[castaside]

Yeah, he does that. Why do you think what he said under the mountain set me off enough to not go back for centuries?

[ Being accused of not helping, of not caring, really haunted him. Still does, since it is still just sitting there. ]

If you figure out how to run the gauntlet of his bullshit and get to the heart of the matter, do share the knowledge.

[forgingfires]

I don't really know where to go.

[He sighs, forehead thudding against the bar.]

He's done plenty to hurt me, but I was....collateral damage. The damage that was the unfair, so it's not like I ever expected him to care about me or anything like that. I was hoping he'd care I was hurt.

To have someone who cared I was hurt for once.

And I believed him, and it was a relief.

And then he choose to hurt me as best as he could personally.

Right when his judgement could actually do so.

[castaside]

You keep referencing him hurting you in the worst way. What was that about?

It must be related to this curse business, I heard that was messy.

[forgingfires]

I fucked up with MK. He was mad. Understandable, so I was willing to take the punishment. Yell at me, break my furniture, I'd even have let him hit me a few times and heal the bruises so MK wouldn't have to see.

Did heal the one bruise.

Then he decided to go for every insecurity, pain, and self doubt he knew about. Unrelated to what happened. Most here. Things about father.

He was giving the Lady Bone Demon a run for her money.

[castaside]

[ He mentally translates this into Wukongish and sighs ]

He really lost it on you. MK does that to him.

--Again, not defending him. I want to say "he should have a better handle on himself a his age" but so should I, and look at the mess I made today.

[forgingfires]

He should have a better handle when he got on me for not having one.

[He turns his head to look at Macaque.]

It's hard to unpack with him.

[castaside]

Eh, give it a few centuries. You'll be able to figure it out.

Still might want to punch him in the face, though.

[forgingfires]

Pretty sure that will always be the case. He's very good at getting under people's skin. It's like the unpleasant version of Noodle Boy.

[castaside]

Even when we were together I regularly wanted to punch him out. But certainty of losing that fight makes the prospect a lot less fun.

[ He also wanted to do a lot of other things which he won't mention, you're welcome. ]

[forgingfires]

Still feels like it'd be worth it some days. [Just the satisfaction of maybe getting in one good punch.]

[castaside]

That's because you don't know how he gets when it's about revenge.

[ Just trust him, it's not worth it. ]

[forgingfires]

Petty, is he?

[castaside]

Sometimes. Although maybe less so now, even if he still is with me.

I know how it sounds, believe me. Why would I be still interested on whatever level I am, given all that? Et cetera.

[forgingfires]

Why are you still interested?

[Which is more prompting then confused.]

[castaside]

All those irritating things? Make me want to jump him. [ You asked. ]

That and a lot of history. He has a way with a lot of different types, but with me it was different. I didn't actually mind being in his shadow all the time as long as he was close.

Even with everything that went bad, the feelings never changed.

[forgingfires]

Ah. [Well, at least it's not a situation where he can't imagine Wukong sleeping with people. There are whole other issues.]

I could understand that. Being in the spotlight can be nice, but it's better to be close with loved ones, even if they're center stage.

[He would prefer to make loved ones happy versus his own ambition.]

[castaside]

I never wanted any of it. All the power beyond what anyone could ever need, being fifty times immortal or whatever he was going for, conquering Heaven... though the latter more because I thought it was a bad idea than because I didn't think they had it coming. I ended up going along because I couldn't tell him no.

I just wanted him to stick around sometimes.

[forgingfires]

[They really did have a lot alike. He had been excited to help his parents conquer the world, of course he had been. He wanted to make their dreams come true. But he realized how much the idea he was enamored with was making them proud, making them happy. Helping them achieve their dream was just an easy way to do that.]

[But just being able to be a happy family? That was more than enough for him, in the end.]

He was stuck in the idea of what he thought was best, what was wanted, and totally missed what you really needed.

[castaside]

To be fair, I didn't tell him. I tried a few times, but he either wasn't listening or he'd get that look on his face that said he was so excited to do whatever it was and I'd get stars in my eyes. Sure wish I'd tried harder.

Half the reason I'm telling you all this is so you don't make the same mistakes with MK. Or the girl. [ He doesn't care about her, as established, but no one deserves to feel this way. ]

[forgingfires]

....I could see myself getting caught up in that. If Noodle Boy or Saya were the type to run off like that. [A pause.] Dragon Girl might be.

[Thankfully MK and Saya are a bit more Sensible in regards to things like that because Red Son is absolutely the type to get stars in his eyes and go along with crazy plans.]

[RE: World conquering.]

[castaside]

It's only a problem if you're not interested in running with them. Or if it's a hideously self-destructive idea and you can't say no.

Part of love is give and take, I've learned that since. I was as bad about giving all the time as he was about taking, they're both equally disastrous.

[forgingfires]

I can't say I wouldn't do the latter. I would like to pretend I wouldn't, but the evidence does not support me.

...they are?

[castaside]

Taking all the time is obvious. But giving all the time leads to resentment, weariness, feeling alone. Any of them could be deadly to a relationship, and you'd be lucky if it was only one.

[forgingfires]

...

[He wasn't so sure for most of that until the loneliness part.]

Ah.

That is pretty bad.