forgingfires | Seasons Inbox

[They really did have a lot alike. He had been excited to help his parents conquer the world, of course he had been. He wanted to make their dreams come true. But he realized how much the idea he was enamored with was making them proud, making them happy. Helping them achieve their dream was just an easy way to do that.]

[But just being able to be a happy family? That was more than enough for him, in the end.]

He was stuck in the idea of what he thought was best, what was wanted, and totally missed what you really needed.

To be fair, I didn't tell him. I tried a few times, but he either wasn't listening or he'd get that look on his face that said he was so excited to do whatever it was and I'd get stars in my eyes. Sure wish I'd tried harder.

Half the reason I'm telling you all this is so you don't make the same mistakes with MK. Or the girl. [ He doesn't care about her, as established, but no one deserves to feel this way. ]

....I could see myself getting caught up in that. If Noodle Boy or Saya were the type to run off like that. [A pause.] Dragon Girl might be.

[Thankfully MK and Saya are a bit more Sensible in regards to things like that because Red Son is absolutely the type to get stars in his eyes and go along with crazy plans.]

[RE: World conquering.]

It's only a problem if you're not interested in running with them. Or if it's a hideously self-destructive idea and you can't say no.

Part of love is give and take, I've learned that since. I was as bad about giving all the time as he was about taking, they're both equally disastrous.

I can't say I wouldn't do the latter. I would like to pretend I wouldn't, but the evidence does not support me.

...they are?

Taking all the time is obvious. But giving all the time leads to resentment, weariness, feeling alone. Any of them could be deadly to a relationship, and you'd be lucky if it was only one.

...

[He wasn't so sure for most of that until the loneliness part.]

Ah.

That is pretty bad.

It is.

It's not only nostalgia and still having it so bad for him I can taste it that make me reluctant to blame him entirely. I was there, I had choices.

[Just. Not going to poke that brain worm right now.]

[He's not sure he's ready for that anytime soon.]

Relationship problems are often both people making mistakes. Noodle Boy and I were both being...quite idiotic for a while.

I'd have a hard time listening to it about MK, but feel free to tell me all of the vampire's flaws. It'd sure make me feel better.

[ He's just saying. ]

Oh, he doesn't look that bad. He was just convinced that I wasn't utterly smitten with him. [Okay, it was DEEPER THAN THAT, but he's not reading MK for filth.]

When it comes to her, however, that was largely me. Mostly in that she is an absolute wrecking ball when she wants you. Not unlike Noodle Boy when he wants your friendship, she is just a lot more comfortable in romance and sexuality than him.

That was another moment of me clawing at the walls, but it was more trying to figure out what the feelings were.

Okay, I was wrong. That definitely did not make me feel any better.

[ So if she wants Wukong, he's bound to reciprocate eventually... wonderful. ]

Sorry. She's a force of nature.

I'm not any happier about it either.

[ he avoids grumbling with a long drink and refilling his glass. ]

She's that bad with boundaries that she won't lay off, knowing it'll hurt you?

There is a lot of context around it.

Which, by the way, Wukong agrees her want for not boundaries, so have that when he freaks out about the bite.

Noted. But you might have noticed that he makes his own rules about these things, double standards are kind of his thing.

True.

But still, its always nice to have specific examples.

It is.

...He might not care about the bite. For all I know, he has no interest anymore.

...so, in fairness, I saw a few memories of you two around each other.

If he has no interest in you, I'll eat my favorite car. The only other person who draws his attention that hard is Noodle Boy.

...Really? [ He's actually surprised. Both by the memories thing and the thinking Wukong is interested thing. ]

What makes you think so? Because I know I'm not willfully blind about much, this area slightly more than most but still, if I saw the slightest chance I'm fairly certain I'd feel something more than hopeless.

Wukong doesn't let himself connect to others. Its the self protection thing. If its not the Noodle Boy, he tries very hard to keep people at arm's length. I can't say pity for him isn't at least a little part of why I relented on boundaries.

Did you know he didn't even meet the rest of Noodle Boy's friends until months after he got the staff? When the Spider Queen took over the city. He doesn't spend time around them, not unless they're doing hero stuff.

And I know you've recognized them. The others might be blood, but at minimum, the Scholar is a reincarnation.

And still he enforces that distance.

But you? Even when the Noodle Boy has his attention, his eyes still turn at least a little to you.

No one else can do that. Despite how rigid his distance is, your presence is still a crack he hasn't been rid of.

In case you hadn't noticed, we don't exactly connect so well these days. But I do spend most of my time making a point to keep him distant.

[ He said he wasn't blind, not that he always acts reasonably. ]

And despite the fact you are both throwing up walls as hard as you can, you two still haven't succeeded at it.

That doesn't come from indifference.

I wouldn't have called it indifference. More "resentment and weariness and loneliness". [ See what he did there ]

Which means he misses you.

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